Best 215+ Pie Jokes & Puns to Crust Up Your Day

By /

From apple to pecan, pumpkin to chocolate—this collection serves up over 215 hilarious, heartwarming, and pun-filled pie jokes that everyone can enjoy. Whether you're sharing a slice at Thanksgiving, baking with kids, or just need a laugh with your coffee, there's a perfectly crusted quip waiting for you.

Pie Jokes & Puns

Ever had one of those days where nothing goes right—your coffee’s cold, your socks don’t match, and you accidentally liked a photo from 2017? Yeah, we’ve all been there. But you know what always makes things better? Pie.

Not just because it’s warm, comforting, and smells like someone loves you—but because pie is basically joy wrapped in a flaky crust. And when you pair it with a perfectly silly pun or a laugh-out-loud joke? Suddenly, the world feels lighter.

That’s why we’ve gathered over 215 pie-fect jokes—sweet, sassy, nostalgic, and gloriously goofy—all baked with love (and a generous pinch of wordplay). Whether you’re sharing a slice with Grandma, sneaking the last piece at the office, or eating cold pie straight from the fridge at midnight… there’s a laugh here with your name on it.

So go ahead—dive in, crack a smile, and remember: life may not always be fair… but pie? Pie is always there for you.

Best Pie Jokes, Sweeten Your Humor.

Best Pie Jokes, Sweeten Your Humor.
  1. Why did the pie go to therapy? It had deep filling issues.
  2. I told my pie a secret—it’s been holding it in ever since.
  3. My love language? Pie. Preferably warm, with a side of whipped cream.
  4. Pie isn’t just dessert—it’s emotional support pastry.
  5. Why are pies such good listeners? They’re always full of empathy… and filling.
  6. Life is short. Eat the pie.
  7. I don’t need a knight in shining armor—I need a baker with a fresh apple pie.
  8. Pie: the only circle that solves all my problems.
  9. If you can’t crust someone, can you really trust them?
  10. Pie: because “I’m fine” is a lie, but “I had pie” is the truth.

Funny Pie Jokes, Crust Up with Laughter!

Funny Pie Jokes, Crust Up with Laughter!
  1. I’m not saying I’m perfect, but my crust is flakier than my ex’s promises.
  2. Don’t make me choose between you and pie—I’ve seen how you eat pizza.
  3. My pie didn’t just break up with me… it left me with only the bottom crust.
  4. Why was the pie always invited to parties? It knew how to fill the room.
  5. I tried to write a love letter to pie… but it was too crumby.
  6. That pie gave me crust-confidence.
  7. You can’t spell “delicious” without “pie”… okay, you can, but it’s less fun.
  8. My pie has more layers than my personality.
  9. When life gives you lemons, trade them for lemon meringue pie.
  10. I’m not lazy—I’m in energy-saving mode… waiting for pie.

Apple Pie Jokes

Apple Pie Jokes
  1. Apple pie: the only thing that makes “freedom” taste sweet.
  2. My patriotism peaks when I smell apple pie baking.
  3. “Liberty and justice for all”—and a slice of apple pie for me.
  4. Why did the apple pie run for president? It promised a crust-worthy future.
  5. In America, we don’t just bake apple pie—we believe in it.
  6. Apple pie: proof that even apples can have a second act.
  7. My grandma’s apple pie could end wars.
  8. “Life, liberty, and the pursuit of apple pie.”
  9. Apple pie doesn’t judge—it just fills your soul (and your stomach).
  10. If apple pie were a person, it’d wear stars, stripes, and a cinnamon apron.

Thanksgiving Pie Jokes, Gobble & Giggle.

Thanksgiving Pie Jokes
  1. Thanksgiving without pie is just… Thursday with extra stress.
  2. I came for the turkey, but I’m staying for the pie buffet.
  3. My Thanksgiving plate: 10% turkey, 90% pie samples.
  4. Why did the pumpkin pie blush? It saw the whipped cream.
  5. At Thanksgiving, I’m not full—I’m just waiting for pie capacity to open.
  6. Pie is the real reason we give thanks.
  7. My gratitude list: family, health, and the fact that pie exists.
  8. “Save room for pie” is the only commandment I follow.
  9. Pumpkin pie: the dessert that says, “Yes, I’m basic—and delicious.”
  10. After Thanksgiving dinner, I enter “pie hibernation mode.”

Christmas Pie Jokes, Holiday Cheer Slices.

Christmas Pie Jokes, Holiday Cheer Slices.
  1. Santa doesn’t check his list twice—he checks the pie list thrice.
  2. All I want for Christmas is mince pie… and maybe world peace.
  3. Mince pie: the only fruitcake relative I actually like.
  4. Christmas morning without pie is like socks without presents—sad.
  5. My holiday spirit is 50% lights, 50% warm cherry pie.
  6. Rudolph’s nose isn’t red—it’s just reflecting the glow of a fresh-baked pie.
  7. “Deck the halls with boughs of holly… and a pecan pie on the counter.”
  8. The best Christmas carol? “Jingle Bells, Bake All the Pies.”
  9. I don’t need mistletoe—I’ll kiss anyone who brings pie.
  10. Christmas pie: because cookies are cute, but pie is committed.

Pumpkin Pie Jokes, Spice Up Your Day.

Pumpkin Pie Jokes, Spice Up Your Day.
  1. Pumpkin spice isn’t a flavor—it’s a lifestyle… with pie.
  2. My love for pumpkin pie is gourd-geous.
  3. Fall isn’t official until I’ve cried over a perfect pumpkin pie.
  4. Pumpkin pie: the only reason I tolerate sweater weather.
  5. I don’t do fall colors—I do fall crusts.
  6. “Basic” is just another word for “pumpkin pie enthusiast.”
  7. My therapist suggested I talk to someone… so I baked a pumpkin pie.
  8. Pumpkin pie season: when your personality matches your dessert.
  9. I’m not obsessed—I’m just pumpkin-pie-ssessed.
  10. If you don’t like pumpkin pie, are you even living in October?

Berry Funny Pie Jokes, Sweet & Tart.

Berry Funny Pie Jokes, Sweet & Tart.
  1. Blueberry pie: the OG mood booster.
  2. Cherry pie walks into a bar… the bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve minors.”
  3. My relationship goals? As stable as a well-set berry filling.
  4. Raspberry pie: tart enough to keep you honest, sweet enough to forgive you.
  5. Blackberry pie taught me that good things come to those who wait… and bake.
  6. Why did the strawberry pie get a promotion? It was jam-packed with talent.
  7. Berry pie: because sometimes you need a little zing in your life.
  8. “You’re the blueberry to my pie.” (Romantic? Maybe. Accurate? Absolutely.)
  9. Mixed berry pie: the ultimate group project that actually works.
  10. If life gives you berries, make pie—not lemonade. That’s just inefficient.

Chocolate Pie Jokes, Sweet-Toothed Delights.

Chocolate Pie Jokes
  1. Chocolate pie: because chocolate cake felt too mainstream.
  2. My willpower melts faster than chocolate pie in July.
  3. Chocolate pie doesn’t ask questions—it answers them.
  4. “Is it a brownie or a pie?” Yes.
  5. Chocolate silk pie: the dessert that whispers, “You deserve this.”
  6. I don’t need therapy—I have chocolate cream pie.
  7. Chocolate pie: rich in flavor, richer in emotional support.
  8. If chocolate pie were a person, it’d be my emergency contact.
  9. Warning: chocolate pie may cause spontaneous joy and fork theft.
  10. Chocolate pie: proof that angels bake too.

Clean Pie Jokes, Kids & Family Fun.

Clean Pie Jokes, Kids & Family Fun.
  1. Why did the pie go to school? To get a little crust-ucation!
  2. What do you call a pie that tells jokes? A pun-apple pie!
  3. My teddy bear loves pie… especially the bear-ry kind!
  4. Pie + friends = the best kind of math.
  5. “Don’t play with your food!” …unless it’s pie. Then it’s called “taste testing.”
  6. What’s a pie’s favorite game? Hide and slice!
  7. My dog tried to eat my pie… now we’re in paw-lice custody.
  8. Pie is like a hug from the inside.
  9. If you share your pie, you’re a sweet friend!
  10. Pie: the only circle that’s always welcome at the kids’ table.

Grandma’s Pie Jokes, Old-Fashioned Freshness.

  1. Grandma’s pie recipe: 1 cup love, 2 cups butter, and a secret pinch of “mind your business.”
  2. Her pie didn’t just taste good—it healed generational trauma.
  3. Grandma’s kitchen: where “a little bit” means “the whole stick of butter.”
  4. “I don’t use recipes,” she said, winking over a lattice-top masterpiece.
  5. Her pie crust could mend broken hearts and broken treaties.
  6. Grandma’s rule: no pie talk until you’ve washed your hands and said grace.
  7. That pie wasn’t baked—it was blessed.
  8. Her apple pie had more wisdom than my college degree.
  9. “You’ll understand when you’re older,” she said, sliding me a warm slice.
  10. Grandma’s pie: the original comfort food influencer.

Romantic Pie Jokes, Love at First Slice.

  1. Are you a cherry pie? Because you’ve got me pitting for you.
  2. I don’t need roses—I need you holding a warm pie.
  3. You + me + pie = the only love triangle I endorse.
  4. “Will you be my valentine?” …and also my pie-sharing partner?
  5. My heart skips a beat… and then demands pie.
  6. Love is sharing your last slice… unless it’s chocolate. Then it’s every baker for themselves.
  7. You’re the filling to my crust.
  8. Date night idea: bake pie, eat pie, nap in pie-induced bliss.
  9. “I love you more than pie.” (Liar.)
  10. Our love story? It’s flaky, sweet, and holds together surprisingly well.

Diner Pie Jokes, Served with Sass.

  1. “Coffee? Black. Pie? All of them.”
  2. The diner waitress doesn’t ask if you want pie—she assumes you’re human.
  3. My life motto: “Pie first, questions later.”
  4. That slice of cherry pie cost $4.99… but the sass was free.
  5. Diner pie: because sometimes you need dessert at 7 a.m.
  6. “You look like you’ve had a long day.” slides over a slice of pecan pie
  7. The check comes with pie recommendations, not apologies.
  8. In this diner, we don’t do “no pie.” We do “which pie?”
  9. Her coffee was strong, her pie was stronger, and her attitude? Legendary.
  10. Diner rule #1: Never leave without pie. Rule #2: Never question rule #1.

Game Night Pie Jokes, Hungry Fan Fun.

  1. Halftime show? More like pie-time show.
  2. My fantasy football team is named “The Pie-rates.”
  3. Touchdown? Sure. But did you bring pie?
  4. Game night snack hierarchy: chips → dip → pie (obviously).
  5. “Fumble the pie and you’re benched.” – Coach’s Rule #7
  6. My MVP? Most Valuable Pie.
  7. We don’t keep score—we keep pie slices.
  8. Playoff pie: extra filling, zero regrets.
  9. “Hut hut… bake!”
  10. Champions eat pie. Also, everyone else.

Coffee & Pie Jokes, Late-Night Laughs.

  1. Coffee keeps me awake. Pie gives me a reason to stay up.
  2. My midnight snack isn’t a snack—it’s a pie-philosophy session.
  3. “One coffee, one slice of pie, and existential dread—coming right up!”
  4. Coffee: for the body. Pie: for the soul.
  5. 3 a.m.? Perfect time to question life and eat cold pie.
  6. My ideal date: rain, coffee, and a shared slice of buttermilk pie.
  7. “I don’t need sleep—I need pie and caffeine.”
  8. Cafe special: “Buy one coffee, get one free existential crisis… and pie.”
  9. Coffee fuels the grind. Pie rewards it.
  10. Late-night pie: because dreams are overrated.

Smart Pie Puns, Cocoa-Nutty Wordplay.

  1. I’m pi-ssed off without pie.
  2. 3.14159… and a slice of cherry pie.
  3. My love for pie is irrational… like pi.
  4. “Let’s multiply the joy—double crust, double filling!”
  5. Pie > π. Fight me.
  6. I don’t do math—I do pie-thagoras.
  7. “What’s your angle?” “Acute one… with a side of peach pie.”
  8. Pie: the only constant I trust.
  9. My brain has 100% pie capacity and 0% storage for your birthday.
  10. “Are you a baker or a mathematician?” “Yes—pie chart specialist.”

Birthday Pie Jokes, Skip the Cake!

  1. Who needs cake when you’ve got pie? (Answer: no one.)
  2. Happy Birthday! Your gift? First slice of warm apple pie.
  3. “Make a wish!” …I wished for more pie.
  4. Birthday rule: candles optional, pie mandatory.
  5. My birthday cake is just a pie in disguise.
  6. “How old are you?” “Old enough to know better… but young enough to eat pie for breakfast.”
  7. Birthday pie: because cake is basic.
  8. Surprise! It’s not a cake—it’s a pie-rate treasure!
  9. “Many happy returns!” …of the pie plate.
  10. Age is just a number. Pie is eternal.

School Pie Jokes, Classroom Chaos.

  1. “Show your work.” Draws a perfect pie chart titled ‘Reasons I Need Pie’
  2. My lunchbox has two compartments: sadness and pie.
  3. Teacher: “No food in class!” Me, holding pie: “This is a learning tool.”
  4. Pop quiz: What’s flaky, sweet, and better than algebra?
  5. Detention snack: contraband blueberry pie.
  6. “Group project?” I brought pie. We got an A.
  7. My science fair project: “The Emotional Impact of Pie on Teenagers.” Results: significant.
  8. Recess is just pie-prep time.
  9. “What did you do this weekend?” “Baked pie. Learned nothing.”
  10. School motto: Pie Veritas (Truth through pie).

Office Pie Jokes, Workplace Filling.

  1. “Team-building exercise?” I brought pie. Morale: restored.
  2. My productivity peaks 30 minutes after pie consumption.
  3. “Who ate my pie?” entire office avoids eye contact
  4. Office rule: if you bake it, you must share it… unless it’s chocolate. Then it’s survival of the fittest.
  5. “Can I get your feedback?” “Only if you brought pie.”
  6. My desk drawer: pens, paper, emergency pie.
  7. “Happy Friday!” slides pie across conference table
  8. The real MVP? The intern who ordered pie for the meeting.
  9. “Workplace wellness program” = weekly pie rotation.
  10. “Sorry I’m late—traffic… and a pie emergency.”

Baking Fails & Pie Disasters.

  1. My pie didn’t rise—it just gave up like the rest of us.
  2. “It’s not burnt—it’s artisanal charcoal crust.”
  3. My filling leaked so much, the dog thinks he’s in a soup kitchen.
  4. I followed the recipe… but my oven has trust issues.
  5. “It’s a deconstructed pie.” (Translation: it collapsed.)
  6. My lattice looks like a spider had a nervous breakdown.
  7. “Don’t worry—it’s the thought that counts.” (And the smoke alarm.)
  8. My pie is gluten-free, sugar-free, and joy-free.
  9. “It’s supposed to be rustic.” (It’s supposed to be edible.)
  10. Baking fail silver lining? Now I have an excuse to order pie.

Single Slice Jokes, Solo Sweetness.

  1. My date tonight? Me, a fork, and zero apologies.
  2. “Relationship status: committed to this single slice.”
  3. I don’t need a plus-one—I am the plus-one… to pie.
  4. Solo pie night: where the only drama is whether to eat it warm or cold.
  5. “Treat yourself” isn’t advice—it’s a pie mandate.
  6. My love language? Not sharing my pie.
  7. “Alone” just means more pie for me.
  8. Self-care = buying a whole pie and eating it in peace.
  9. “I’m not lonely—I’m in a monogamous relationship with pie.”
  10. Single slice, full heart.

Halloween Pie Jokes, Spooky & Sweet.

  1. “Trick or treat?” “Pie or scream.”
  2. My pumpkin pie glows in the dark… from all the cinnamon.
  3. Ghosts don’t haunt houses—they haunt pie pantries.
  4. “Boo! …now hand over the pecan pie.”
  5. Witch’s favorite dessert? Eye-berry pie.
  6. Candy corn is just pie filling that gave up.
  7. “Double, double, toil and trouble… extra crust on the double.”
  8. My Halloween costume? A walking slice of pie.
  9. “The pumpkin said what?!”
  10. Trick-or-treaters get candy. Adults get pie. Fair is fair.

Travel Pie Jokes, Global Giggles.

  1. In England, they call it “steak pie.” I call it “reason to visit.”
  2. My suitcase has three things: socks, passport, and a frozen pie.
  3. “Bonjour! Do you have… tarte aux pommes?” (Yes. Yes, they do.)
  4. Australian meat pie: the snack that doubles as a weapon.
  5. I don’t collect postcards—I collect regional pie recipes.
  6. “Jet lag remedy: warm pie and zero regrets.”
  7. My travel motto: “When in Rome, eat pie. (They have it. Trust me.)”
  8. Lost in translation? Not when pie is involved.
  9. “Souvenir?” “I brought back a pie pan and emotional baggage.”
  10. Global truth: pie transcends borders, languages, and customs.

Bonus: Mini Pie Jokes & Knock-Knock.

  1. Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Dough.
    Dough who?
    Dough you want the last slice of pie?
  2. Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Berry.
    Berry who?
    Berry sorry, but I ate your pie!
  1. Life’s too short for bad pie.
  2. Pie today, gone tomorrow.
  3. You can’t buy happiness… but you can buy pie. And that’s kinda the same.
  4. Pie: the original influencer.
  5. My spirit animal is a pie with legs.
  6. “I’m on a seafood diet.” “Oh?” “I see pie… and I eat it.”
  7. Pie: because adulting is hard.
  8. Final thought: You’re a-peach, but pie is eternal.

Just like a perfect pie, laughter has a way of bringing people together. Whether you came here for a quick chuckle, a clever pun, or a full-on crust-up, we hope these pie jokes added a little extra sweetness to your day. Remember — life doesn’t always have to be serious; sometimes all you need is a warm slice of humor to lift your spirits. So share these jokes, spread the smiles, and whenever things get tough… just roll with it and keep your filling happy!

Related Posts

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to Top